As the world’s population continues to grow virtually exponentially, this question comes up all over the world. This is an existential issue. The question really is “To whom do I matter?” No one matters to everyone. Some people influence a lot of people—either for good or for evil/bad. No matter how accomplished you become, there will be others who are better known, more famous, more impactful (good or bad).
SO, we start with self. I am only one person, and I can decide what I want to do with the life I have here. I can make a difference in a variety of ways. For the good, I can become a self-reliant citizen and strive to influence others to do good things. For the bad, I can learn to cheat, steal, hack, tag, vandalize, murder, and create mayhem. Whatever your family and neighborhood background, you can make that choice—and I admit it’s not easy.
I came from four generations of alcoholics who died in a variety of ignominious ways. (like roasting themselves to death on coal clinkers during the winter) I was raised in a poor family and place, born into a converted chicken coop. AND my mother insisted I do my homework and get good grades and my dad built one motel and then others with his bare hands. I learned to study hard and persevere. I chose not to drink alcohol—at all. Many children don’t have that kind of support and may end up thinking “What’s the point?”
Here’s the deal. Early support or not, you choose. That may require swimming against the local current. Finding new habits. Learning to be a life-long learner. Learning to contribute, to work for what you want, leaving your “campsite” cleaner than you found it, to read lest you have nothing to say.
Don’t wait for someone or something else to “call” you to a life’s purpose. You choose. What do you want to do with your limited time here? Maybe it’s build things, maybe it’s write programs, maybe it’s nurse others, maybe it’s create art. There are myriad options.
IF you choose to become self-reliant and to follow your creative passion in life, you will matter more and more. If you become a teacher, as I did, you may never know how much you matter—it’s hard to tell what students pick up and what they ignore.
Mother Nature does not grant you or anyone any rights or privileges—only governments do that—despite what many “humanists” may say. Millions of people live their lives in total obscurity, eking out what existence they can and then dying. So “what’s the point? Do I matter?”
I say “you can.” You can matter—if you choose to do so. Your circle of influence may be small, moderate, large or huge. It will depend on what you choose to do with your life. But whether your influence is small or large, in my book, everyone who chooses to give more than they take matters greatly. Those who take more than they give matter in a negative way because they consume more than they create.
Coming from a converted chicken coop, I eventually became a tenured, chaired professor, wrote 20+ books, over 300 cases and technical notes, developed a world-wide consulting practice, and taught thousands of MBA and doctoral and executive education students. I created a website (www.nadobimakoba.com) summarizing my life’s work, wrote A Song of Humanity: A Science-based Alternative to the World’s Scriptures in the attempt to combat the perpetuation of mythological rubbish in every region of the globe, wrote blogs and bliaries, answer a lot of questions on Quora, AND virtually no one knows who I am. Do I matter? Clearly, not so much. Maybe to a few. To my wife of 43 years, a lot (she tells me). To my children, less. To my students, good for some, probably bad for some others. And I try.
I’ve had three last names—long story. Out of that, my purpose in life became “to help others find themselves.” I inherited an award-winning self-assessment and career development system and taught that for 35 years. In my view, everything I’ve done emanates from my core purpose—to help people find themselves. I get letters now and then from those for whom I made a positive difference.
One of my colleagues tells a story often: a man walking with his friend along a beach, stopped and picked up a starfish and threw it back into the ocean. His friend commented, “Why do you do that? There hundreds of starfish on the beach. You aren’t making a difference.” The man replied, “I made a difference for THAT one!” And so he did.
And so can you. Whether it’s one person, a bunch, a lot or millions, you can make a difference, you can matter. Simply satisfying your own natural tendencies (sex, drugs, alcohol, better clothes, more houses etc) won’t do it though. You matter when you affect other people’s lives. I encourage you to do that in a positive way rather than a negative way.
Do you matter? You can. If you choose to do so. But don’t compare yourself to the rich and famous—you have no idea where they came from or how, but you can matter to the people you come in contact with—either for good or for bad.
SO, we start with self. I am only one person, and I can decide what I want to do with the life I have here. I can make a difference in a variety of ways. For the good, I can become a self-reliant citizen and strive to influence others to do good things. For the bad, I can learn to cheat, steal, hack, tag, vandalize, murder, and create mayhem. Whatever your family and neighborhood background, you can make that choice—and I admit it’s not easy.
I came from four generations of alcoholics who died in a variety of ignominious ways. (like roasting themselves to death on coal clinkers during the winter) I was raised in a poor family and place, born into a converted chicken coop. AND my mother insisted I do my homework and get good grades and my dad built one motel and then others with his bare hands. I learned to study hard and persevere. I chose not to drink alcohol—at all. Many children don’t have that kind of support and may end up thinking “What’s the point?”
Here’s the deal. Early support or not, you choose. That may require swimming against the local current. Finding new habits. Learning to be a life-long learner. Learning to contribute, to work for what you want, leaving your “campsite” cleaner than you found it, to read lest you have nothing to say.
Don’t wait for someone or something else to “call” you to a life’s purpose. You choose. What do you want to do with your limited time here? Maybe it’s build things, maybe it’s write programs, maybe it’s nurse others, maybe it’s create art. There are myriad options.
IF you choose to become self-reliant and to follow your creative passion in life, you will matter more and more. If you become a teacher, as I did, you may never know how much you matter—it’s hard to tell what students pick up and what they ignore.
Mother Nature does not grant you or anyone any rights or privileges—only governments do that—despite what many “humanists” may say. Millions of people live their lives in total obscurity, eking out what existence they can and then dying. So “what’s the point? Do I matter?”
I say “you can.” You can matter—if you choose to do so. Your circle of influence may be small, moderate, large or huge. It will depend on what you choose to do with your life. But whether your influence is small or large, in my book, everyone who chooses to give more than they take matters greatly. Those who take more than they give matter in a negative way because they consume more than they create.
Coming from a converted chicken coop, I eventually became a tenured, chaired professor, wrote 20+ books, over 300 cases and technical notes, developed a world-wide consulting practice, and taught thousands of MBA and doctoral and executive education students. I created a website (www.nadobimakoba.com) summarizing my life’s work, wrote A Song of Humanity: A Science-based Alternative to the World’s Scriptures in the attempt to combat the perpetuation of mythological rubbish in every region of the globe, wrote blogs and bliaries, answer a lot of questions on Quora, AND virtually no one knows who I am. Do I matter? Clearly, not so much. Maybe to a few. To my wife of 43 years, a lot (she tells me). To my children, less. To my students, good for some, probably bad for some others. And I try.
I’ve had three last names—long story. Out of that, my purpose in life became “to help others find themselves.” I inherited an award-winning self-assessment and career development system and taught that for 35 years. In my view, everything I’ve done emanates from my core purpose—to help people find themselves. I get letters now and then from those for whom I made a positive difference.
One of my colleagues tells a story often: a man walking with his friend along a beach, stopped and picked up a starfish and threw it back into the ocean. His friend commented, “Why do you do that? There hundreds of starfish on the beach. You aren’t making a difference.” The man replied, “I made a difference for THAT one!” And so he did.
And so can you. Whether it’s one person, a bunch, a lot or millions, you can make a difference, you can matter. Simply satisfying your own natural tendencies (sex, drugs, alcohol, better clothes, more houses etc) won’t do it though. You matter when you affect other people’s lives. I encourage you to do that in a positive way rather than a negative way.
Do you matter? You can. If you choose to do so. But don’t compare yourself to the rich and famous—you have no idea where they came from or how, but you can matter to the people you come in contact with—either for good or for bad.
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